Well, shit. My main man-crush Chris Pratt is back on the market, and I don’t feel too good about that. Earlier today, Pratt and his wife, fellow funny actor Anna Faris, announced they will be separating after eight years of marriage. Now it’s nothing new to see celebrity couples form and break apart like water molecules, and sometimes these relationships span the course of a few years. Many factors are in play when you are in a business that shoves your personal life to the front page and you work in a business with no shortage of beautiful people you are tasked with working closely with, even intimately.
However, while these situations are common problems for high profile pairs of people, they are also part of everyday life for the rest of us. Social media allows for our own personal lives to be scrutinized by a larger following of people than we normally see in person on any given day, and oftentimes this is our doing as we willingly, perhaps even gleefully offer up our daily goings-on to the “friends” who are connected to us through that medium. We are also tempted by the prospect of other lovers who have something different to offer in the looks or personality departments, and to a degree this is how we are wired as a species seeking to spread as much of our genetic code around to promote the higher probability of our line’s survival. I once believed in everyone having one true love they were destined to spend their lives with, but have since adopted a more random and circumstantial view of everything, romance included. Beyond the staggering statistics of everyone matching up perfectly with someone else, after having observed the beginning and end of many relationships around me between lovers of a variety of ages I determined that not everyone is going to find a special someone, while others will be flush with numerous potential mates. So much of who we interact with is dependent upon our character and actions and how our values remain or change in reaction to what happens around us. I mean to say that as we grow, we can develop stronger interactions with people or have them fray, and not always is this caused by our doing, but also by what they do and what the world we live in does. I know some folks in my family and at work who have broken away from certain people they were once close with, including parents, after the most recent and exceptionally heated American presidential election. To be fair, such is a particularly wild shift within a large and populous nation, but it serves as one of the outside factors of a relationship that can facilitate serious change with people’s interactions, be it better or worse. Of course, there are so many factors at play, but we can scientifically nail down some confident estimates of potential partners for each of us with a formula with an interesting original purpose:
As hopeful or scary as this can be (it’s all a matter of perspective, really; the numbers don’t change based upon your excitement or fear), it does not explain why we feel badly about love that comes to an end. Whether it is a close friend or Chris Pratt breaking up with his significant other, chances are your investment in his life will render this news a bummer. Perhaps it’s simply a sad end to the story, but if you are closer to the break up like you would be with a friend, then you may have more at play. One of my friends got divorced about a year and a half ago and while I was and am closer to him, I also was friends with his wife. I have not seen or spoken with her in over a year and do not anticipate doing either in the future. We never truly know for certain what he future holds for us, which can be exciting or scary again based on your perception, but I will probably never see her again beyond possibly bumping into one another at the grocery store or at a baseball game. We’ll most likely exchange a few greetings, have the briefest of catch-ups, and bid farewell perhaps forever this time. This has been the case thus far with some earlier friendships that I have had that have ended for whatever reason or reasons. While I do not have as extensive of a list of former lovers compared to former friends, the sentiment is similar in that not all relationships we form last forever, and those that continue rarely continue unchanged. Consider any show you watch or story you read, would you find it compelling if the characters and their friendships remain status quo from start to finish? In fiction we appreciate the arc that each character has, and while our real lives are unscripted we still seek change. I’m not suggesting that we all need a dose of a specific change in the relationships in our lives – I’m not suggesting anything here; as usual, I’m an observer before I’m an activist – but the desire for fellow companionship and the search for the means to develop oneself along with another never ceases to be a curious subject.
Thanks for reading and watching! I hope my pragmatism wasn’t too cold; I try to convey my own personal level of optimism regarding the vastness of everything within my deeper dives into any topic that brings about a broad connection to the cosmos. If there’s anything you’d rather I be discussing, then let me know, along with any questions or comments you may have, send it all to firstname.lastname@example.org.